An Unholy Alliance

Over the years we’ve come to see that the only thing more tragic than the things that have happened to us is what we have done with them. Words were said; painful words. Things were done; awful things. And it shaped us to our way of thinking, acting, seeing and believing.
Something inside of us shifted. We embraced the messages of our wounds. We accepted a view of ourselves through another’s eyes. And from that we chose a way of relating to our little world.
We made a vow never to be in that place again.
We adopted strategies to protect ourselves from being hurt again.
A person that is living out of a broken, wounded heart is a person who is living a self-protective life. They may not be aware of it but it is true. It’s our way of trying to “save ourselves.” We also developed ways of trying to get something of the love our hearts cried out for, ache is there, and will it ever be filled?
Our desperate need for love and affirmation, our thirst for some taste of romance and adventure and something to be wanted for - is still there. So we turned to the opposite sex or to food or to novels, and we lost ourselves in our work or at church or in some sort of service.
All this adds up to the person we have become today.
Much of what we call our “personalities” is actually the mosaic of our choices for self-protection plus our plan to get something of the love and acceptance we were created to have. But not all of us had good role models to follow.The problem is, our plan has nothing to do with G-d, or His ways. The wounds we received and the messages they brought form a sort of unholy alliance with our fallen nature as people.
We will control our world, from hurting us, so we think,
But there is also an ache deep within, an ache for intimacy and for life.
We’ll have to find a way to fill it.
We’ll just have to arrange for the life G-d wants us to have by opening His Book and find His love and acceptance. Can we learn to see ourselves through His eyes? It will take much time but it can be done.
Best time to start is today!