Supper Time

I am so tired and exhausted L-rd. Seems like the last two months I have been fighting the flesh in my own power and losing badly.
I had a vision of me walking out in the water to meet You. I kept on walking but couldn’t find You. Then I was over my head and was just too tired to walk or swim back.
How I made it back to shore only You know but I found myself sitting quietly and peacefully listening to You.
I slept till 4 p.m. And woke up as if in a drunken slumber, swaying in my movements, bumping into things. What is going on?
Did I miss the boat somewhere?
Even in my driving I find myself going very slow, trying to focus and not even sure were I am heading.
Is it the elements? Is it the age factor?
You not only have to restore my youth, but energy and strength also.
I seem to have given up and lost all my hopes, dreams and visions.
Is it still the big “I” syndrome?
Are You finished with me? Or have I not even come close to arriving yet?
I love you Father, for You have been my life support. Maybe I just couldn’t pay the right price required to serve You in maturity.
I know I am one who is hidden, but You seemed to have hidden me so well that I can’t even find myself.
The water is calm and the fish are jumping as my beloved pets sit patiently at my side. See, I am never alone and whether I feel Your presence or not I know You promise to never leave me nor forsake me.
My soul is being quieted as I sit and listen to the sounds of the waves and the gentle blowing of the wind. Nature is speaking from all angles, calling out to You.
Once again You remind me of the beauty of Your creation and the trials and tribulations that we go through here is but stepping stones towards our training and equipping. This too will pass, and pretty soon it will be suppertime when You will be standing at the door calling us all home.
What a day that will be as we all gather around the grand Seder table singing “Worthy is the Lamb! For Thou are worthy O L-rd!”
Our little tiny concerns are just a fading moment and we should count it all as being like the Messiah, for He also had to suffer.
If we could only learn to take our eyes off of ourselves glancing upwards towards home – our state of mind would be so much better, and life would be more tolerable. For we are all only strangers passing through, returning to our natural home.
I should not worry if I am not serving as much as I would like down here, for when it is supper time I will have much to do and will be doing it with the right heart and attitude.
What we did not take time to learn here we will be learning in the heavenlies.
Maybe I will have a teaching/preaching job, or maybe I will be able to learn under the Masters. All I know is we will be serving the way we were meant to in our full capacity.
David said “Be still O my Soul” - everything works out for the best for those that love You and we will all be in the right place at Your right time.
Maybe I had to wade out into the deep and drown myself to be raised up in Your loving arms and placed back on solid ground with my eyes and ears cleaned out.
Maybe it was to lay down my own agenda.
Things are changing in these last days. It is not to be this little group here or that little group there.
It is not to be about stealing sheep!
It is not to be about competing with one another!
It is not to be about who had what title or who has the greater anointing!
It is not to be about who is higher than the other – like I am an apostle and you are just a pastor. We are all servants supposedly working for the same cause – are we not?
G-d is calling for unity – A oneness of the body! With all parts of the body working together for His glory, there is no job higher than the other for all parts have gifts that will benefit the entire body. What you do not have I have, and what I do not have, you have. Let us start using each part to its fullness not leave any out.
Why are we not supporting one another?
Why are we not encouraging one anther?
Why do we think we have to step on another to climb higher – just to be recognized?
Why don’t we come together to work and support each other in great teamwork?
When we all get to the other side – do you think we will still be in our own little groups with our own little agendas? I think not!
Do you feel like you’re stumbling and ready to fall? My mother gave me a plank ---
“Sometimes, you just have to take the leap, and build your wings – on the way down.”
Don’t be afraid to take that leap for the L-rd said: “He shall give His angels charge concerning you: and in their hands they shall bear you up, lest at any time you dash your foot against a stone.”
This physical body is just the container of our soul. Stop looking at the outside and look deeper into the condition of the soul. The body will rot and die away but our souls live forever. How is your soul doing? Are you over self and the flesh heading for eternity?
No, life is not about me and my concerns or my owes. My life is to be focused on You and Your Will as I wait for that sound of the shofer telling me it’s time to come home for the table is set for Seder Meal in the marriage feast of the Lamb.
In the meantime I will do what I know to do for the advancement of Your Kingdom and Your Glory!
Please don’t let me throw my pearls before swine.